I haven't thought of something really good to write about for a while, and a random thought popped into my head today (thanks to the Facebook note I was writing due to boredom).
The question was something like: Don't you hate it when 15-year-old kids say "I love you" after they have been dating for only a few months?
I know that when you're younger, you think you like someone and talk to them for a week before they decide to ask you out. Then you're soooo excited, you talk to them every night on msn until 3am, and see them the next day at school to hang out and get to know them some more. Everything is so overwhelming because you're just getting to know this person and learn about their personality: funny, smart, cute, entertaining, romantic, energetic, etc.
You don't really know what love is, there isn't a set definition because there are all sorts of love. Love for your family, your friends, and now this new concept of love for your boyfriend or girlfriend. The dictionary itself just says love is an intense feeling of deep affection...so could what you're feeling for this person you've been dating for the past three months actually be love? You think so and out it comes, "I love you."
To be honest, I don't care if 15-year-olds are saying I love you, as long as they actually feel it in that moment.
Maybe when they break up a week from then they will realize as they mature that maybe what they thought was love was just a crush...or maybe they will end up being with that person for the rest of their lives and believing it was really love from the second they got to know each other.
I don't think their should be a set time frame on when two people say, "I love you," to each other. I do, however, believe that it should only be said if it is actually meant. Those three words that make such a strong and complete sentence shouldn't be thrown around casually or they will easily lose their meaning.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Love
Amor, amore, amour, liebe...love.
Love is defined as, "(1) unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another (2) strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (3): attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (4): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests," by the Websters Dictionary.
There are many famous love poems and quotes, one that has struck me quite strongly is:
"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two. - Captain Corelli's Mandolin. "Love is the beauty of the soul." --St. Augustine"
Although I think it would be difficult for someone in our time to be able to fully say they have felt love, or being in love, I think that the quote above would come pretty damn close to what love should feel like.
I myself am feeling like I have stumbled into love. I was not at all looking for love, because the way I see relationships nowadays is something that will never last forever...but that's the funny part, because I have always heard that when you are least looking, you will find it. And here I am. No one can be sure of a relationships duration, but they can always hope and dream.
Relationships are difficult with the media, and friends always seemingly promoting promiscuity and fun with alcohol and cheating, but relationships are something worthwhile. A friend once told me that his girlfriend at that time did not want to give her 100% to the relationship, for fear that she would get hurt. There he was, giving his heart out to this girl that would not sacrifice for him, what he would for her. The only thing I replied with was, "Well then what is the point?"
While talking to my boyfriend on msn a few nights ago, I thought for a bit before coming up with, "I'm learning love is a scary thing because you gotta put yourself out there and nobody likes putting themselves out there...because it's a dangerous thing to do, people want to stay in their comfort zone where they feel all safe." But I also know that if you want to find true love, you have to put yourself out in that danger zone. When love could be the outcome, true love, then why not risk everything? There are only two possible outcomes: having a broken heart that over time will be healed but never completely - and this is something to learn from, a great experience...or falling madly and deeply in love with someone and having that feeling returned. How many people that have lived full lives do you think can actually say they have felt love, fallen in love, and are fully satisfied with that aspect of their life? I wouldn't guess too many.
There is puppy love, when you're in your early teens, when you get that first crush and then he rejects you at the school dance and you go home to cry for days on end...and then when you're in your late teens you look back and laugh at those nights you wasted. Then there is the love that you may never find, waiting for you when you have finally matured and are responsible enough to handle whatever life may throw at you. This is the kind of love, whether you actually do find it in high school and have that high school sweetie by yourself until death do you apart, or whether you find it in your midlife crisis when nothing seems to be going right and you have dealt with a few divorces...this is the kind of love worth risking everything for.
The only way I believe anyone could find this - the one thing everyone really wants in life - is to be true to yourself. By being true to yourself, this will allow you to be true to others around you. It will then allow for a truthful relationship, no secrets, nothing hidden, everything completely exposed, and allow someone into your life enough to find that love. This is the way I am prepared to live my life, being who I am, and exposing myself to the cruelness of this world, all for love.
:)
Love is defined as, "(1) unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another (2) strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties (3): attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers (4): affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests," by the Websters Dictionary.
There are many famous love poems and quotes, one that has struck me quite strongly is:
"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two. - Captain Corelli's Mandolin. "Love is the beauty of the soul." --St. Augustine"
Although I think it would be difficult for someone in our time to be able to fully say they have felt love, or being in love, I think that the quote above would come pretty damn close to what love should feel like.
I myself am feeling like I have stumbled into love. I was not at all looking for love, because the way I see relationships nowadays is something that will never last forever...but that's the funny part, because I have always heard that when you are least looking, you will find it. And here I am. No one can be sure of a relationships duration, but they can always hope and dream.
Relationships are difficult with the media, and friends always seemingly promoting promiscuity and fun with alcohol and cheating, but relationships are something worthwhile. A friend once told me that his girlfriend at that time did not want to give her 100% to the relationship, for fear that she would get hurt. There he was, giving his heart out to this girl that would not sacrifice for him, what he would for her. The only thing I replied with was, "Well then what is the point?"
While talking to my boyfriend on msn a few nights ago, I thought for a bit before coming up with, "I'm learning love is a scary thing because you gotta put yourself out there and nobody likes putting themselves out there...because it's a dangerous thing to do, people want to stay in their comfort zone where they feel all safe." But I also know that if you want to find true love, you have to put yourself out in that danger zone. When love could be the outcome, true love, then why not risk everything? There are only two possible outcomes: having a broken heart that over time will be healed but never completely - and this is something to learn from, a great experience...or falling madly and deeply in love with someone and having that feeling returned. How many people that have lived full lives do you think can actually say they have felt love, fallen in love, and are fully satisfied with that aspect of their life? I wouldn't guess too many.
There is puppy love, when you're in your early teens, when you get that first crush and then he rejects you at the school dance and you go home to cry for days on end...and then when you're in your late teens you look back and laugh at those nights you wasted. Then there is the love that you may never find, waiting for you when you have finally matured and are responsible enough to handle whatever life may throw at you. This is the kind of love, whether you actually do find it in high school and have that high school sweetie by yourself until death do you apart, or whether you find it in your midlife crisis when nothing seems to be going right and you have dealt with a few divorces...this is the kind of love worth risking everything for.
The only way I believe anyone could find this - the one thing everyone really wants in life - is to be true to yourself. By being true to yourself, this will allow you to be true to others around you. It will then allow for a truthful relationship, no secrets, nothing hidden, everything completely exposed, and allow someone into your life enough to find that love. This is the way I am prepared to live my life, being who I am, and exposing myself to the cruelness of this world, all for love.
:)
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